Saturday, November 9, 2013

The Motorcycle Ride

It's early morning, and my eyes are pried open by my son.

"Mommy!  It's morning time!"

Ugh.  I am so, so tired.  I hear myself murmur, "Just a minute."  Then I hear my daughter come prancing in, asking if we can have pancakes.  Again, I hear myself mumbling a request for more time.  The two of them seem hell bent on touching my face and talking into my ear canal and rearranging my room.

In a fit of desperation, I rolled onto my side and invited them to sit on me and play motorcycle.  My tired little brain figured that if they were sitting on me, they weren't wrecking my room and they weren't touching my face or ears, and maybe I could sleep through it.

Turns out it was the greatest way to wake up EVER!  Somehow, the two of them effortlessly, and without any prior organization that I am aware of, just drifted into the following... I don't know what to call it.  Vignette, or scene, perhaps?  Here is the play by play, but bear in mind... my son is only 3 years old.  This freaked me out and yet made me stuff a pillow in my mouth to stop from laughing out loud, lest I'd break up the fun. 

<Knolan climbs onboard the "motorcycle", aka, my hip.>

KNOLAN:  "Come on honey, hop on!"

KAYCIE:  "OK.  Honey... do you have the baby?  Oh wait.  Nope... I do!  Ok... I'm ready!"

<Kaycie hops on behind Knolan.>

KNOLAN:  "Well then, let's go!  Vroom, vroom!"

KAYCIE: "Oh darling.... this is just marvelous! You've planned the perfect trip for us."

<Lots of vrooming and pretend bumps in the road.  Knolan yanks Kaycie's hands and wraps them around his stomach.  I can see a doll's head peeking out between the kids.>

KNOLAN:  "Better hold on.  It's more safe that way."

KAYCIE:  "Pull over darling.  I need to put our baby in the trunk.   She'll be safer that way, and i'll be safer too, since I will be able to hold on to you better."

KNOLAN:  "Ok, but hurry.  I need gas."

KAYCIE:  "Ok darling."

KNOLAN:  "Ok, here is the gas station." 

<Knolan hops off, somehow manages to use my arm and hand (which he manipulated into a fist with a thumb sticking out) as a gas station nozzle, and to my utter horror, uses my belly button as the gas tank, and then hops back on.>

KAYCIE:  "Oh darling, I just love that you planned this trip.  I've always wanted to ride our motorcycle to Hawaii."

KNOLAN:  "Hawaii??!?  We're going to Toys'r'us!"

KAYCIE:  "Oh.  Ok, well, I guess I could pick up some things for the baby, then.  Let's listen to the radio on the way!"

<Suddenly I hear "Wide Awake" by Katy Perry playing.  Turns out that Kaycie has found my phone, and has taught herself how to play the Kidz Bop album that her aunt Tharen downloaded onto my phone for her.>

KNOLAN:  "Oh look!  A perfect spot to pull over and dance!"

<And then, a dance party LITERALLY ensues.  I lift my head, and the two of them are at the end of the bed, each of them holding onto one of the doll's hands, bustin' a move. Knolan takes a short break from the hand holding to do some sweet breakdancing/3 Stooges moves on the floor, and then he's back up with his girls once more.>

KNOLAN:  "Ok, honey, time to get back on the road."

ME:  "You two are SUCH a sweet couple!"

KAYCIE:  "Well.... Knolan really isn't an appropriate husband for me.  I am going to go back to being his sister."

<end scene>

And just as quickly as it unfolded, the scene was gone... like sunlight behind a cloud.  But how lucky am I?!  I am not refereeing fights at 7am.  They love being with each other!  And I am witnessing everything I had hoped for in my children.

My kids were back to digging in my ears, and all I could do was grin. 


  1. vroom vroom great story bros and sistahs

  2. Love it! I bet you were the cutest motorcycle ever!